Thursday, May 10, 2007

What can we make of this?

From our long, long compatriot, gurufrisbee...

The leading candidates for president in 2008 were asked what their most recent music purchase was or what they are listening to right now on the campaign trail. Here are their answers (and my shameless ideas of what the underlying meaning behind them is):

Delaware Sen. Joe Biden: "My sister's playlist."
Meaning: Biden is a loser and is so out of touch with music he didn’t want to be embarrassed by saying the wrong name of a band.

New York Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton: Carly Simon's "Into White."
Meaning: Confident she has the women, Obama has the blacks, and Richardson has the Latinos, Clinton is trying to reach out to those other Democrats and get “Into White”.

Connecticut Sen. Chris Dodd: Soundtrack to ' Jersey Boys."
Meaning: Chris Dodd is a big geek.

Former North Carolina Sen. John Edwards: U2.
Meaning: I want to be the cool candidate – and I know Bono is like me – super rich and very interested in helping the poor.

Ohio Rep. Dennis Kucinich: Likes Willie Nelson.
Meaning: Dennis smokes weed with Willie on the side.

Illinois Sen. Barack Obama: "The latest music purchase would probably be 'Ray' _ the soundtrack from the Ray Charles movie."
Meaning: I’m black! I really, really am!

New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson: George Strait , "50 Number Ones."
Meaning: Hey all you people put off by the supposed elitist, snobby Democrats – I’m the alternative, ya’ll.
Kansas Sen. Sam Brownback: Christian artist Michael W. Smith.
Meaning: I know the conservative Christians need a choice and I know who Smith endorsed four years ago.

Former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani: Verdi's "Macbeth."
Meaning: Nothing about me will ever makes sense to most people.

Former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee: Evanescence, the goth rock group from Little Rock , Ark.
Meaning: I’m a lock to be out of it before I could even carry my home state with a sympathy vote, but I’m looking for a band to go on tour with as a guitar player.

California Rep. Duncan Hunter: Favors country and gospel.
Meaning: I want to tap into that conservative Christian group, but I don’t want to sound like I know any of them and lose my Californians who know how uncool that would be.

Arizona Sen. John McCain: Likes "Sounds Of Summer - The Very Best Of The Beach Boys."
Meaning: I’m old. I wanted to try to avoid saying ‘Beethoven’, so I went with the hippest group I could think of.

Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney: "Selection of Roy Orbison songs from iTunes."
Meaning: Now Apple will give me money. And in a week, I’ll change my answer to “Selection of Shakira songs from Zune”

Colorado Rep. Tom Tancredo: "Frank Sinatra duet combo."
Meaning: This album is one of those excessive ones where true fans already have heard it all before – which is a perfect way to describe my dead end campaign.