Friday, February 11, 2005

Is Marriage a zero-sum game?

I have been thinking a lot about my posts on gay marriage/matching because I haven't gotten any feedback. But more to the point, the whole discussion about marriage is that the institution of marriage is a zero sum game. That is, if homosexuals are allowed to marry, then it will reflect badly on heterosexual marriage. What a silly idea!

Does my neighbor's divorce reflect badly on my marriage? Does my strong and continually improving marriage somehow reflect positively on my neighbors and friends? If my neighbors are swingers and are not keeping the marriage bed pure does that somehow pull down the institution of marriage or make my relationship worse?

The answer to these questions is no. What one couple does reflects on them. My parents have a strong relationship and are very committed to one another, therefore I have a high regard for marriage. However, two women I work with have seen their parents' relationship implode and think that marriage is a ridiculous idea and are content living with their partner without any sort of legal/secular/sacred agreement.

Marriage, both the relationship and the institution, is not a zero sum game. Instead marriage prospers when all who are involved are strengthened and encouraged. Let's committ the Church to that. If you want to get started right now, check out the Marriage Course and find out about a course near you or order the video tapes and start immediately.